The Joy We Don’t Talk About Enough: Black Men’s Wellbeing

“Drums, please!” Summer, summer, summertime… 

— Will Smith, “Summertime”

I don’t know about you all, but for me, there’s a moment right around the beginning of June when the air starts to feel different. Not just warmer, but lighter. Softer. Like joy is in the breeze.

This past weekend, my husband fired up the grill again. Correction, "we" grilled—but make no mistake, that’s his wheelhouse. A little backstory—we’d gone to Lowe’s to grab something simple, and I surprised myself (and him too, honestly) by buying a second grill—one just for me.

I’ve seen him smile plenty of times, but this one was different. It was bigger. Brighter. It wasn’t just about the grill. It was about being seen.

We stood there, side by side, flipping meat and oysters. No rush. No pressure. Just presence. And that’s when it hit me. In my own quest for wellness, I’ve sometimes overlooked how crucial it is for the men in our lives to have their own rituals, release valves, and quiet joy.

Especially Black men.

There is power and purpose in making room for Black men’s wellbeing in our collective journey toward happiness and elevation. Because wellbeing isn’t just a women-focused conversation, it’s a human one.

Three Black men laugh together on a city street, enjoying a lighthearted moment of connection and joy.

The Quiet Power of Black Men’s Wellbeing

There’s a quiet kind of joy that lives in everyday rituals.

For some, it’s grilling.

For my brother, who’s about to become a father, it’s preparing for something he’s never done before—but already loves deeply.

For the men I saw on TikTok, dancing and singing at Johnny Gill’s birthday celebration. It was brotherhood. It was sacred.

We rarely discuss how essential it is for men to experience happiness. Not the performative kind. But the soft, vulnerable kind. The kind that says:

“You don’t have to carry it all. You’re allowed to exhale.”

A Black man sits barefoot in a chair on the beach, balancing work and relaxation in a peaceful coastal setting.

June Is a Sacred Intersection

June brings so much to honor:

Pride Month – a celebration of love and authenticity

Father’s Day – honoring the quiet strength of fatherhood

Juneteenth – commemorating freedom, resistance, and resilience

These moments remind us that celebration doesn’t require extravagance—just intention, presence, and connection.

This truth truly resonated during my youngest brother’s baby shower. He's expecting his first child next month. The same boy who once wanted to be like “Mike” is now preparing to nurture a new life.

Watching a beautiful mix of blended families and friends wrap him in support reminded me how powerful it is when Black men are celebrated, not just expected to perform. That joy? Priceless.

Three Black men of different generations share a joyful moment, smiling and laughing together in warm sunlight

Celebration Doesn’t Have to Be Expensive

We sometimes think joy has to be big, flashy, or booked months in advance. But joy lives in the in-between:

• A plate of grilled ribs

• A group text that turns into belly laughter

• A memory made in the front yard or over FaceTime

Lately, the deepest joy I’ve felt has come from the simplest places:

• My husband surprising me with dinner so I don’t have to cook

• My grandson placing his hand on my brother’s partner’s belly

• Watching men laugh together in real time

These moments? They’re not just memories. They’re medicine.

Black joy is revolutionary simply because it exists. To rest is radical. To laugh out loud is resilience. To gather, to heal, to be soft. All of it is necessary.

Creating Space for Black Men’s Wellbeing

As we move through this beautiful month of summer beginnings and celebrations, I’m reminded: true wellbeing is inclusive.

We have to advocate for men to feel safe enough to be human. To rest. To feel. To not have to earn joy through labor or sacrifice.

Men deserve self-care routines. They deserve mental health days. They deserve space to pursue their own happiness and elevation.

And everyone reading this deserves to dance to old-school R&B in the middle of the living room, or in the backyard, just because it’s Saturday.

This Is a New Kind of Love Letter

This post? This is a new kind of love letter.

One rooted in reflection. One grounded in intention. One that says:

We see you.

Men. Brothers. Fathers. Friends.

Your wellbeing matters.

Your joy matters.

Your presence is powerful.

“And with a pen and pad I composed this rhyme...

Well… new blog post (LOL) to hip you and to get you equipped for the summertime.”

— Shoutout to Will Smith for my favorite anthem, “Summertime.

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Let’s keep the conversation going.

What are the small moments that bring the men in your life joy?

How are you creating space for everyone’s wellbeing this summer?